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Author Topic: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.  (Read 4238 times)

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Biscuits, soft and sweet

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Dear Amanda,
I've been reading your blog for just over a year now and there are some questions that have arisen.  I doubt that you'll be able to take the time to answer them but I'm just curious.
1)  You sometimes write about how you never receive any royalties from Roadrunner, Amazon, or iTunes, yet I'm always reading about you flitting about the planet with @neilhimself. As a frequent traveller, I know that the price of plane tickets can be pretty pricy.  Who pays, just out of curiousity? Upgrade fees suck and I really cannot imagine Mr. Gaiman downgrading to "Cattle Class."  You strike me as a fiercely independent woman who wants to pull her own weight in a relationship that has very high difference in socio-economic status between the two involved.  I mean, your "Why I'm not afraid to take your money" essay was very well written and raised a LOT of valid points about the industry.
2)  Your period seems to be irregular. A LOT.  Have you been checked out for Fibroids, Endometriosis, or Adenomyosis? Sorry, one of the reasons I ask is that you seem to be quite open and honest about pretty much EVERYTHING (from your long vagina to your cold sores to your massive zits).  It also seems to me that these posts are kind of made in a "Ooooops!  What if?" pregnancy scare kind of manner.  Birth control?  (My daughter REALLY looks up to you.  I mean, she thinks that you hang the stars AND the moon.  She wants to be a musician.) Do you, being the musician that promotes tolerance extremely frequently, kind of feel a responsibility towards younger fans in aspects other than just tolerance.  (Yes, I am well aware that birth control discussions begin at home and, yes, I have started.) What would happen if you were to become pregnant?  I've read that you don't necessarily want children, but accidents happen. Knowing that you've already had an abortion, would you, keep THAT completely private or would you blog about it knowing that someone VERY famous is involved?
(With regards to your period, Black Strap Molasses is a life saver.  1 TBSP in the morning and 1 TBSP at night helps immensely with regards to regulating periods and pain management.)
3.  A couple of years ago there were some not-so-nice allegations (I am identifying them as such because I have NO idea whether they are true or not.)  made about Neil cheating on his wife. If I remember correctly, the person also stated that he was divorced LONG before he admitted it publicly.  IF these allegations WERE true, then, how do you deal with them now? Do you lull yourself to sleep saying, "He would NEVER do that to me." (Hey, we've all been there.)
Just asking & putting my fireman's gear on. :violent5:
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beth of all trades

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I am leaving this post up (for now) but... really? You feel entitled to ask these personal questions of someone you do not know, on a public forum?

Amanda is very open and honest with her fans and the world, but sharing what some consider to be intimate details of one's life does NOT negate the idea of simple decency and respect.  would you ask a stranger on th street these questions? a coworker?

I'm making an example of you (and you had to expect this would happen) but you're not the only one.  a few months ago people were speculating here about my financial arrangements with Amanda. it was part of a larger discussion about how Boxers could help Amanda's financial situation, but it was still out of line.  if we are hanging out and having a beer, feel free to ask me how much money I make--- because that's an appropriate situation and place.

same with this. ask Amanda these things the next time you're getting a drink and catching up.  and if you don't have the kind of relationship that involves one-on-one hangtime, then you shouldn't even dream of this kind of ridiculous prying.

in other words... really?

(yes, I'm aware this person registered TODAY and, as the title of the post implies, is trolling. but this extreme example can serve as a reminder to all of us that at the end of the day once the stage goes dark there are living humans involved who deserve respect.)
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BATTEREDxBRIDExLUVR!

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beth about said everything.

while i'm 95% sure amanda will read this, i have no idea if she will comment on it. however, i do know she specifically reads all blog comments including those posted here on the corresponding threads on the box. question number 2 was once asked in one of those threads, the question being asked with regard to the very same things you asked with regard to. i don't remember amanda answering it. the context was a little bit different though, since the question hadn't been asked with malicious intentions as it was here.
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Quote
I do not want to live to archive my own life.
I see it everywhere around me, especially with the popularity of web diaries, forums, and cell phones that take pictures.
I do not want to fall into the subtle trap of truly believing I Blog Therefore I Am.
amanda, 2005-04-15

BATTEREDxBRIDExLUVR!

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also, if your questions were for amanda, why did you choose to post them here in general discussion and not as a comment on her blog? you made reference to the fact that people might flame you; that's cute but if you cared so much about getting your answer you wouldn't have posted it here.
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I do not want to live to archive my own life.
I see it everywhere around me, especially with the popularity of web diaries, forums, and cell phones that take pictures.
I do not want to fall into the subtle trap of truly believing I Blog Therefore I Am.
amanda, 2005-04-15

Pope Totalfrog

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Re: Questions for Amanda.
« Reply #4 on: January 01, 2010, 05:14:32 PM »

Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.

So why ask?
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Agonistes

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beth about said everything.

while i'm 95% sure amanda will read this, i have no idea if she will comment on it. however, i do know she specifically reads all blog comments including those posted here on the corresponding threads on the box. question number 2 was once asked in one of those threads, the question being asked with regard to the very same things you asked with regard to. i don't remember amanda answering it. the context was a little bit different though, since the question hadn't been asked with malicious intentions as it was here.

amanda did answer the question, and said she hadn't been offended by it (i myself had been puzzled why that question bothered so many people).  however it is phrased a little...........differently in this thread.

the context was different, though, as well.  before the question was asked by a regular, recognized poster asking casually under his own screen name.  from the sound of it, this post is a regular poster (or at least a lurker) trying to not take responsibility for asking prying questions.  well, and they state they read the blog...so maybe a lurker..

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CaffeinatedCassadie

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What would drive you to join a forum just t pry on someones life? If Amanda hasn't posted it, its none of your business. She's an adult and I highly doubt she needs someone she doesn't even know to offer her medical advise. On the note of your daughter looking up to Ms. Palmer, I'm young and I look up to her, but looking up to someone doesn't mean that you are going to do everything in your power to be like them.

in other words... really?
I'm with ya on this 100%
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bitch please, my hate can't be contained in one thread.

CeeGBee

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I'm with the "This Is Beyond The Pale" chorus.....





... My daughter REALLY looks up to you. ...
... however, as I am also a card-carrying member of the Devil's Advocate Club, I do wonder
how much this particlar bit enters into the equation.  Protective mom's have been known to
do a lot more than ask intrusive questions...
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Is it bad that what she said made perfect sense to me?

Morpheus Laughing

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1.The answer is related to yoga and comfortable suitcases.
2. How does speculating on a hypothetical dilemma shed any light on how a person/couple would react to it if it happened? If that happened in any relationship there would be discussions and agreements that would not even have occurred if it were not for the situation.   
3.. This is an especially malicious question - very British tabloid … Besides from the claim being unsubstantiated what’s there to say that anyone can have the piece of mind of fidelity? Check out the infidelity statistics and you’ll see that even the most conservative estimates look a little like Russian roulette. People make their accommodations with situations that are on the whole good as opposed to bad and don’t need to think in terms of 1in6 or 1in10 if things are looking pretty good. I’m not saying that to be cynical but to try and demonstrate that love is all about taking chances. If you live with someone you love for long enough there is 1in2 chance of having to go through an intense grieving process. Pretty bad odds, is love worth it? A lot of people think so and it is because they count on the good times.
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doritojoe89

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Neil cheated on Amanda once. with a flight attendant, who bleeds regularly.
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Sir_Lex

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Re: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.
« Reply #10 on: January 01, 2010, 10:51:06 PM »

aren't you aware that curiosity killed the cat?
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overratedtoejam

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Re: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.
« Reply #11 on: January 01, 2010, 11:05:06 PM »

what. the. fuck.
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Agonistes

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Re: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.
« Reply #12 on: January 01, 2010, 11:15:48 PM »

I'm with the "This Is Beyond The Pale" chorus.....





... My daughter REALLY looks up to you. ...
... however, as I am also a card-carrying member of the Devil's Advocate Club, I do wonder
how much this particlar bit enters into the equation.  Protective mom's have been known to
do a lot more than ask intrusive questions...


cee, to join you in the devil's advocate's chair:

well and with the exception of the third question, which i found to be pretty rude, not to mention the tone kind of catty (in the grand tradition of protective moms asking rudely prying questions), i really don't see much wrong (other than the challenging tone of the phrasing) of the first two.  i mean, when you approach a creative financing method, people are going to be interested, and they are going to ask questions like this.  i don't think it is polite to assume or imply that 1) the bill is getting footed by someone, or that, if it is, this is in any way our business, or 2) that neil gaiman is too 'precious' to fly coach once in awhile; unless you know the details of all his flight information, this is kind of a weird assumption to make; i have seen a few celebrities fly under any sort of ticket they can find, frankly (a frequent flyer should realize this.  it's not like every writer is rolling in stephen king's money, and even the mighty king-man has been seen on commercial coach flights).  while the question might have seemed a legitimate one, it is asked in a pretty presumptive manner.  perhaps even a jealous one?  'flitting about the planet'....sounds like mocking.  perhaps the fear of flames comes from the tone?  i mean, surely there is a better (and more respectful) way to say 'hey i was wondering, how do you foot what must be a massive transportation bill for touring and recreation on creative financing?' or something along those lines.  yeah, a dollar amount is tacky to ask for.....but not taboo.

also, if someone on 'the view' said these same things (as they do daily about any number of people), how would one 'make an example' out of them?  or would one, instead, be thrilled shitless for the publicity, understandably?  i only ask as an example of perspective.

in the end, i can clearly see that we are a nation(s) that cannibalizes celebrity.  from a social/fan standpoint, i can easily understand 'it's not your place to ask' but again, i present the reality of the situation...if someone posts about the intimate recesses of their body and functions that 'should only be asked about in an intimate friendship situation' then it follows logically that they are going to have uncomfortable and even rude questions.  it's not, therefore, a question of whether anyone 'should' ask or whether they have the 'right' to ask, it is the fact that they will.  at length they will, and in front of anyone who will listen, and all the while they will point to the blog and the self-taken naked pics and protest that anyone who bares so much of themselves has no reason and indeed, no right to claim privacy.  i'm not saying it is right--let me say that again--I AM NOT SAYING IT IS RIGHT...but it is no more wrong than a tabloid paying a quarter of a million dollars to get topless pics of some royal family member who thinks they are well hidden enough to get nekkid.  is that wrong?  probably, yes, of course it is--from many perspectives.  but it exists.  i don't think anyone would disagree with me when i point out there are far worse things that can be done to a public figure than embarrassing or snarky lines of questioning.  and amanda manages to remove much of that already with her unique brand of self-honesty and self-exposure.  i mean really think about it; we are arguing about the 'right' of someone to ask tacky questions instead of, say, about the guy who, i dunno, shot the president to impress amanda or something.  that's actually kind of encouraging when you look at what could be, and what is...amanda's very accessibility i think defuses some potential weirdnesses before they even start, possibly. 



and perhaps amanda's approach to celebrity will change things; i hope it does, i'm seeing signs of it (after all, how many threads like this does the sb get?  for the most parts amanda's fans are respectful and loving, more so than most fan bases you see now or ever will see).....but i wouldn't waste the energy for the indignation it takes to get bejiggety on questions like this.  it's not worth defending someone's honor when the honor is ambiguous in the first place; it's like doing 'ask amanda anything' and then complaining when some of the questions are inappropriate.  hey----you did say 'ANYTHING'.  you can't pick and choose what is appropriate or not when you open the floodgates on your own privacy.  but then, i don't really see amanda doing that; i see a lot of others doing it for her.

again i am joining ceegee bee in devil's advocate-ing and not myself saying i approve of this line of questioning; if it were me, i wouldn't like it, but then i am a more private person, and in the same situation would act completely different about my privacy, so i can't answer for amanda based on what i would do, or approve of.  i'm just saying to an extent it is inevitable, and even understandable, if not socially pleasant, or nice to see being asked of someone we care about.
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peppamintdynamo

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Re: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.
« Reply #13 on: January 01, 2010, 11:18:57 PM »

A couple of years ago there were some not-so-nice allegations (I am identifying them as such because I have NO idea whether they are true or not.) 

Then why are you asking this question? This is a loaded and very voyeuristic question. In fact, all of these questions are. Just because someone shares some of their personal life with the public (not you, the public,) doesn't give you any right  to ask such grossly intimate questions.

As Beth said, "...really?"
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doritojoe89

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Re: Questions for Amanda. Fully aware that I will get FLAMED for asking them.
« Reply #14 on: January 02, 2010, 12:10:00 AM »

aren't you aware that curiosity killed the cat?

is this a threat?!
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