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Author Topic: "is that my son wearing a dress?"  (Read 15138 times)

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imaginary friend

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"is that my son wearing a dress?"
« on: August 25, 2010, 05:48:27 PM »

interesting quick read about a dad and his 4-year-old son:   http://www.salon.com/life/real_families/index.html?story=/mwt/feature/2010/08/23/my_son_in_a_dress

thoughts?

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2010, 06:35:33 PM »

I saw a boy in Seattle wearing a pink ruffle covered dress over his normal clothes sitting on his dad's shoulders and I thought it was amazing.
I used to run around with my shirt off and wished with all my might that I was a boy.
Gender stereotypes are just rules and rules are meant to be tested, if not broken.
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Tiervexx

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #2 on: August 27, 2010, 07:17:38 PM »

if a rule has nothing to do with helping society function it should be broken.
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Indja

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #3 on: August 28, 2010, 12:33:31 PM »

Poor kid. I think people forget how absolutely deadly serious such things are for little'uns - I mean, it's easy to think as an adult "what difference does it make what you wear", but the truth is that when you really, really want to do one thing and then either can't or get mocked for it, it fucking canes. I mostly feel bad that he was ill and couldn't dress up at all >.<

I think, however, the kid's parents could have handled it better. They could have been actively supportive rather than passively accepting - although, purely because of the amount kids change their minds, probably putting off buying the costume until the last minute is a good idea xD Making an issue out of something like this, even if the kid isn't necessarily around while his parents are worrying about it or talking to other parents about it, just reinforces the idea that "normal" and "the norm" are the same thing and that going against that is something not to be done. They get enough of that at school from teachers and peers without having it at home as well.

Incidentally, just reminded me of something - the little boy I babysit, he's 9 now but they moved up here from London when he was about 4 or so. He spent the whole summer playing outside in a... I think it was Belle's dress from Beauty And The Beast. That's yellow, right? Anyway, at the start of the summer he played out on the playing fields down the lane from his house, along with his elder sister and sometimes me. Then older kids who hung out there started taking the piss, so he didn't want to go there anymore and only played in the lane leading to the fields. People took the piss out of him there as well, and he moved closer to the house. By the end of the good weather, he was playing solely in his back garden, and by the time school started he'd banished the dress to under his bed and wouldn't wear it at all except inside the house, and even then only if it was his family or my mum or me there (we're like really old family friends, so I guess he feels safe with us or whatever).
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CeeGBee

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #4 on: August 28, 2010, 12:39:27 PM »

^  This child needs a dose of Brian Viglione..... positive role-model and whatnot.
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Indja

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #5 on: August 28, 2010, 01:18:44 PM »

^  This child needs a dose of Brian Viglione..... positive role-model and whatnot.

The kid in the article or Sammybumpoohead (as I like to call him xD)? Sam's alright, he seems to have come into his own as he's got a bit older - he goes to my old primary school, which is a pretty nice one, so he should be alright until secondary school at least. Ooooh, he's a lovely kid! :D
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The Angel Raliel

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #6 on: August 29, 2010, 04:39:23 AM »

my only issue with the entire thing is that halloween costumes should be ghosts and monsters etc (designed to ward off the bad spirits while welcoming the good spirits into the home for winter) not barney the dodgy dinosaur or snowhite....
I used to dress up in dresses and stuff when I was little and I think it is absolutely fine... kids are forced to conform far too early nowadys... although Crouch End is stuffed full of kids that habitually wear dressing up clothes around town... this is a good thing
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #7 on: August 29, 2010, 04:58:00 PM »

my only issue with the entire thing is that halloween costumes should be ghosts and monsters etc (designed to ward off the bad spirits while welcoming the good spirits into the home for winter) not barney the dodgy dinosaur or snowhite....
I used to dress up in dresses and stuff when I was little and I think it is absolutely fine... kids are forced to conform far too early nowadys... although Crouch End is stuffed full of kids that habitually wear dressing up clothes around town... this is a good thing
What about Barney doesn't terrify you? 

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #8 on: August 30, 2010, 07:27:03 PM »

Just on a random note, I think this music video (aka mini-movie) could also fit here, it's all in norwegian except for parts of the singing, but it's on topic really.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/3JvcmicOqkg" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/3JvcmicOqkg</a>
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #9 on: August 31, 2010, 05:12:01 PM »

I can't say the parents in the article were wrong or right. It is a hard line to straddle. I'd like to think that I would have backed the kid all the way, but unless it is your child and you face that situation, you don't really know how you would act. I wish I knew more of the story, like what happened next?

Many kids have had it worse, and have been slapped down every time they dared to cross a line or even just to speak up, yet end up strong and wonderful individuals. Some have had open and supportive parents and went on to become murderers and junkies. Being a good parent is only half the battle. The child has the other half to fight for themselves.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #10 on: September 05, 2010, 04:50:32 PM »

I can't say the parents in the article were wrong or right. It is a hard line to straddle. I'd like to think that I would have backed the kid all the way, but unless it is your child and you face that situation, you don't really know how you would act. I wish I knew more of the story, like what happened next?

Many kids have had it worse, and have been slapped down every time they dared to cross a line or even just to speak up, yet end up strong and wonderful individuals. Some have had open and supportive parents and went on to become murderers and junkies. Being a good parent is only half the battle. The child has the other half to fight for themselves.

I totally agree. I don't have any kids but I helped raise my baby brother Will (who is 7 and not actually a baby except in my head) and I am pretty sure that somewhere I have pictures of him wearing a sequinned dress as a 3 or 4 year old or other costumes and some of those times would certainly have been when I was looking after him and having to be the one to decide whether or not I should discourage him from wearing this or that to the park. You want to be able to honestly say that you don't care what other people think, but it is so much more complicated than that. You can't say 'take that off, that's for girls' and then they end up learning that it is 'bad' in a potentially harsher way but once they've reached the point where the other kids have convinced them that it's not good, you can't go 'oh no, it's okay, keep doing that.' when the world has told them not to. You can get a great big 'no' or you can push the issue and risk making them do something they don't want to do anymore (what with kids being impressionable and all) and probably screwing shit up more than if you'd just left it alone to begin with.
If this is making any sense.
And I think it sucks extra for little boys. It's as normal for little girls to run around with their shirts off as it is for little boys because small children like the whole 'not wearing clothes' thing and really, you can't stop them. It's socially acceptable for girls to wear clothes that boys can wear but when a boy puts a dress on, everyone has an opinion. Fun for the masses.
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #11 on: April 12, 2011, 10:16:09 PM »

J. Crew ad that has some people bothered because the mom painted her son's toenails pink.

read about it here:    http://moms.today.com/_news/2011/04/12/6458726-jcrew-ad-stirs-up-controversy-with-pink-nail-polish?GT1=43001


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The Angel Raliel

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #12 on: April 13, 2011, 04:11:52 AM »

oh dear....another excuse for bigots to think they are protecting the innocent and be outraged by gender stereotypes that have only existed for 150 years max
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@raliel

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #13 on: April 13, 2011, 05:54:20 AM »

I was just reading about that this morning. Firstly, what the fuck? Secondly...What the fuck? I used to paint my little brothers' nails all different colours and so far, I'm pretty sure it doesn't mean a damn thing. It means that sometimes little boys like to have their nails painted because they think it's fun.

ALSO what is this comment?
Quote
His mom is the one distorting reality for him here. Little boys are not toenail painters. Men do not paint their toe nails because:
A: We have no reason to, because it serves no practical purpose.
B: It is automatically instinctually gender confusion/homosexual behavior.
C: Most men could care less what their feet look like because we rarely ever see them anyway.

...Women paint their toe nails becasue:
A: It serves them a purpose in that the majority of women take care of their feet.
B: The purpose it serves is that women like to wear toe revealing shoes that match some outfit or ensemble which makes them look and/or feel sexier.
C: The purpose of looking and/or feeling sexier to a woman means she is able to fulfill her basic instinct to mate. Toe painting is just another adornment like jewlery that is specifically designed to attract a member of the opposite sex so that the age old mating dance can eventually produce offspring.

I don't even...What...Aside from all the stuff he's listed which I don't particularly feel like dissecting right now, his mother is distorting reality for him?! That just cracked me up.
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Niels

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #14 on: April 13, 2011, 06:57:10 AM »

I think it's an adorable picture and an adorable little kid. And I really want his t-shirt.
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #15 on: April 13, 2011, 12:18:19 PM »

I was just reading about that this morning. Firstly, what the fuck? Secondly...What the fuck? I used to paint my little brothers' nails all different colours and so far, I'm pretty sure it doesn't mean a damn thing. It means that sometimes little boys like to have their nails painted because they think it's fun.

ALSO what is this comment?
Quote
His mom is the one distorting reality for him here. Little boys are not toenail painters. Men do not paint their toe nails because:
A: We have no reason to, because it serves no practical purpose.
B: It is automatically instinctually gender confusion/homosexual behavior.
C: Most men could care less what their feet look like because we rarely ever see them anyway.

...Women paint their toe nails becasue:
A: It serves them a purpose in that the majority of women take care of their feet.
B: The purpose it serves is that women like to wear toe revealing shoes that match some outfit or ensemble which makes them look and/or feel sexier.
C: The purpose of looking and/or feeling sexier to a woman means she is able to fulfill her basic instinct to mate. Toe painting is just another adornment like jewlery that is specifically designed to attract a member of the opposite sex so that the age old mating dance can eventually produce offspring.

I don't even...What...Aside from all the stuff he's listed which I don't particularly feel like dissecting right now, his mother is distorting reality for him?! That just cracked me up.

yeah, the comments were quite the moron parade.  ;D

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #16 on: April 13, 2011, 03:28:40 PM »

many species have more awesome plumage on the males.  personally, i'd love to see some really butch guys get together and bring back foppery, instead of pouring all that energy into screwing shiny bits to their trucks and bikes.  most manly men i know are starved for a little color.
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #17 on: April 13, 2011, 06:33:51 PM »

being mexican-american (2nd gen), I've noticed that, as Hispanic guys (as a group, not individually) get more and more Americanized, they start employing an ever smaller palette in terms of clothing colour. the hispanic teens these days may as well be...well, white.

edit: on 2nd thought, that's unfair to the white guys. american male fashion as a whole is on an unstoppable slide to the bottom of the generic trench.

same thing in the african-american community from what i see.

 :buck2:

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #18 on: April 13, 2011, 07:53:36 PM »

i'm proud of my son-in-law.  he's a kentucky redneck truck driver to the bone, but he sports a lovely pink shirt on weekends, and will kick anyone's ass who doesn't agree it's a purty shirt.
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CottonCandy

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #19 on: April 14, 2011, 02:23:04 AM »

I was just reading about that this morning. Firstly, what the fuck? Secondly...What the fuck? I used to paint my little brothers' nails all different colours and so far, I'm pretty sure it doesn't mean a damn thing. It means that sometimes little boys like to have their nails painted because they think it's fun.

ALSO what is this comment?
Quote
His mom is the one distorting reality for him here. Little boys are not toenail painters. Men do not paint their toe nails because:
A: We have no reason to, because it serves no practical purpose.
B: It is automatically instinctually gender confusion/homosexual behavior.
C: Most men could care less what their feet look like because we rarely ever see them anyway.

...Women paint their toe nails becasue:
A: It serves them a purpose in that the majority of women take care of their feet.
B: The purpose it serves is that women like to wear toe revealing shoes that match some outfit or ensemble which makes them look and/or feel sexier.
C: The purpose of looking and/or feeling sexier to a woman means she is able to fulfill her basic instinct to mate. Toe painting is just another adornment like jewlery that is specifically designed to attract a member of the opposite sex so that the age old mating dance can eventually produce offspring.

I don't even...What...Aside from all the stuff he's listed which I don't particularly feel like dissecting right now, his mother is distorting reality for him?! That just cracked me up.

There is no purpose for anyone to paint their toe nails, it's just for bit of fun. Go back a few hundred years, and men wore more make-up or adornments than women did, this trend might return anytime. And obviously in animal world, it is men who are coloured all pretty, attracting females, so if you talk about "natural"...
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #20 on: April 14, 2011, 03:41:55 AM »

i always understood that nail-painting was a pagan holdover referencing the 'firesticks' or psychic or healing power emanating from the fingertips of the goddess (power points being fingers, toes, vulva, and forehead); hence why red-tipped nails were somewhat daring and taboo when nail enamel started getting to be the thing to do, and a sign of boldness in females such as 'professional' women and the like.  somewhat along the lines of prostitutes being the first to cut their hair, also as a way of separating themselves by adornment, or in this latter example, lack thereof.
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #21 on: April 14, 2011, 11:08:33 AM »

years ago, the night before the last band i was in played our 1st gig, i had the bandleader's gf paint my nails. she was so geeked to do it that she was actually vibrating with happiness.

i never forgot her reaction to my request, so I've had a few gfs since do it at least once. each of them attacked me as soon as it was dry.  :glasses9:

anyway, here's Jon Stewart's take - he led off his show with the nails story:  http://www.hulu.com/watch/232355/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-wed-apr-13-2011


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The Angel Raliel

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #22 on: April 14, 2011, 01:53:02 PM »

many species have more awesome plumage on the males.  personally, i'd love to see some really butch guys get together and bring back foppery, instead of pouring all that energy into screwing shiny bits to their trucks and bikes.  most manly men i know are starved for a little color.
what do you think I have been doing? purple tricorns and brocade frockcoats are all the rage ( in my wardrobe)
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #23 on: April 14, 2011, 09:48:09 PM »

many species have more awesome plumage on the males.  personally, i'd love to see some really butch guys get together and bring back foppery, instead of pouring all that energy into screwing shiny bits to their trucks and bikes.  most manly men i know are starved for a little color.
what do you think I have been doing? purple tricorns and brocade frockcoats are all the rage ( in my wardrobe)
and i applaud you wholeheartedly, but i think you need minions.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #25 on: June 17, 2011, 11:50:36 PM »

Are they going to expell me for wearing shorts that cover my bum? :(
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #26 on: June 18, 2011, 02:23:14 PM »

ya know...i think it's stupid that people get their panties into a bunch about this sorta stuff...

my dad who is one of those "manly men who works on cars and has lots of power tools and hates girly things" used to play with barbies when he was little cause his little sister wanted him to, and he used to play with dolls like that with my sister and i when we were young. he also went with my sister to get her first manicure (she was about 7-8 and wanted one cause my mom and i got them, mom said no you're to young, dad said if you get a good grade on a test we'll go, she got the good grade she got to go) well, she got scared when she saw all the tools and stuff so my dad decided to get one with her, and even though he got clear nail polish so you couldnt really tell, HE LOVED IT, he thought it was the BEST and quite frankly he told EVERYONE he knew that he got one and loved it, and no one made fun of him (probably cause they're afraid he'd kick their ass though, but still)

also, once when i was forced to work at my moms church at vacation bible school, i got to work with the 3-5 year olds and the "teacher" of the class was the mom of a kid i was in high school with...she showed up with her youngest son and he was wearing his slightly older sisters pink flowery dress, clip on earrings, and nails painted and honestly at first thought he was a little girl with really short hair (cause people do that) but then i heard her say his name and realized he was a boy and i thought "wow this mom is AWESOME!" cause she didnt care that he was wearing a dress...and neither did any of the other kids there, they thought it was fine no big deal...when i asked her about it she said that he just really liked playing with his sister because they were so close in age and that he wanted to dress like her and it didnt bother her...i saw them a few years ago and the boy looked just like a boy: pants, shirt with a silly saying or transformers whatever, and it was honestly weird for me to see him dressed as a boy...

i just dont understand why people are so threatened by it?
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #27 on: June 18, 2011, 04:11:33 PM »

I think this guy did a good job. He protected his kid from being a laughing stock at a young age but also let his kid be Snow White.

I've noticed some Dads freak out about their boys being 'girly.' Dude, this is what they do at this age! My five year old nephew used to wear bracelets his sister made, saying "I'm a pretty gurl." My other nephew would also kiss pictures of Johnny Depp that I would kiss and put on chap stick. He was copying me because he saw what I did. This is how they learn.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #28 on: June 18, 2011, 04:23:26 PM »

Quote
C: Most men could care less what their feet look like because we rarely ever see them anyway.

Grrrr. That's not even grammatically correct. If one is going to be ignorant on the Internet, one should at least write well.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #29 on: June 18, 2011, 05:23:01 PM »

i agree mockery, when i was little i tried to copy things my parents/grandparents or other adult types who i knew did...

like my grandparents used to smoke, and when i was little i would pretend to do it too with candy or carrots or things like that...but i sure as hell dont smoke (wow i totally just accidentally wrote smore) now!

i also used to pretend to like sports games because my dad watched them, and i quite frankly dont like sports generally speaking

this is how kids learn, and they learn what they like or dont like from those things...

also if you're gonna freak out cause your kid wears a dress when he's young, just imagine when he gets into that "rebellious" phase, if he remembers how much you HATE that, he might just start dressing like a girl just to piss you off, ya never know
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Mockery

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #30 on: June 19, 2011, 06:38:17 PM »

i agree mockery, when i was little i tried to copy things my parents/grandparents or other adult types who i knew did...

like my grandparents used to smoke, and when i was little i would pretend to do it too with candy or carrots or things like that...but i sure as hell dont smoke (wow i totally just accidentally wrote smore) now!

I know! That's how we learn!
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #31 on: June 19, 2011, 07:38:19 PM »

Quote
C: Most men could care less what their feet look like because we rarely ever see them anyway.

Grrrr. That's not even grammatically correct. If one is going to be ignorant on the Internet, one should at least write well.

nah. compounding ignorance is what it's all about on the internet.  O0

#@!

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #32 on: June 30, 2011, 02:48:05 PM »

many species have more awesome plumage on the males.  personally, i'd love to see some really butch guys get together and bring back foppery, instead of pouring all that energy into screwing shiny bits to their trucks and bikes.  most manly men i know are starved for a little color.

Precisely why I LOVE color in my tattoos.
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imaginary friend

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #33 on: July 16, 2011, 07:58:33 PM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!


tanqgirl

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #34 on: July 16, 2011, 08:21:22 PM »

oh. my. god.


HE IS MY HERO!! i love how he's CLEARLY one of the better cheerleaders too! and he's totally rocking that outfit lol. i also love how he gets to be in the front and whatnot, and doesnt care that he's wearing that outfit AND everyone in the audience is clearly cheering for HIM. SO AWESOME!!
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #35 on: July 17, 2011, 01:12:32 PM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!




I think I just found my future husband.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #36 on: July 18, 2011, 12:29:36 AM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!
I think I just found my future husband.
You're too tall for him....   ;)
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #37 on: July 18, 2011, 01:35:20 PM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!
I think I just found my future husband.
You're too tall for him....   ;)
Way to crush my hopes and dream.
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slyvia k

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #38 on: July 18, 2011, 02:03:50 PM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!
I think I just found my future husband.
You're too FEMALE for him....   ;)
yeah, now accuse me of being a homophobe...
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CeeGBee

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #39 on: July 18, 2011, 11:23:28 PM »

well, he's someone's son, right?


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Zta22vOvTfs&amp;feature=related</a>

#@!
I think I just found my future husband.
You're too FEMALE for him....   ;)
yeah, now accuse me of being a homophobe...
I dunno Syl...  In all seriousness, Asian views of gender-roles can be rather
different from what we expect from our "Western" mindset.  I could easily
see the argument that he's simply a far better cheerleader than the last
President of the US....
 

(Yes, Dubya was a cheerleader at Andover Prep School...)
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tanqgirl

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #40 on: July 19, 2011, 12:11:47 AM »

vinsanity was forced by me to watch that guy, and he said that if he'd been more fit and better at dancing in high school he'd have loved to do what that guy did  ;D
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #42 on: April 18, 2012, 11:03:11 PM »

This:

...pissed off quite a few visitors to the new Museum of the Confederacy at Appomattox, as
well as a few staffers, enough than management took it down...

Me, I thought it was funny, but "Southern Heritage" types tend to be a bit stuffy, VERY conservative, and
some of them (though not as many as you might have thought) quite racist, so all in all I can't complain too much.

(Relevant blog entry here, but be warned: these people are quite Right-Wing.)
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #43 on: April 19, 2012, 01:24:50 AM »

the gloves ruin it.

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #44 on: April 19, 2012, 05:34:18 PM »

she totally stole the dress design from shirley q liquor.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #45 on: April 19, 2012, 07:17:16 PM »

she totally stole the dress design from shirley q liquor.
Meh, the cut is classic, and the pattern's 150 years out of date, but I think she makes it work.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #46 on: April 20, 2012, 09:54:45 PM »

she totally stole the dress design from shirley q liquor.
Meh, the cut is classic, and the pattern's 150 years out of date, but I think she makes it work.
of course she makes it work.  but it's not original.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #48 on: August 28, 2012, 10:50:07 AM »

http://badwolfonbakerstreet.tumblr.com/post/30237936359/jokerchenisdifferent-oneandonlygabriel-i

 :glasses9:

That is so fantastic! I love it :D (I also love the Cumberflump gif in the sidebar, although the movie it's from was a bit pants...)
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absynth aura

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #49 on: August 28, 2012, 04:45:36 PM »

I just read that. Now that's parenting done right!
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slyvia k

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #51 on: October 24, 2012, 02:16:21 PM »

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Indja

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #52 on: October 24, 2012, 06:52:25 PM »

http://jezebel.com/5954457/watch-strangers-tell-a-little-boy-in-a-costume-store-that-he-cant-be-a-princess-for-halloween
"nip it in the bud?" YUCK. those people are sick. but the last girl really gave me a bit of hope  :love5:

Hot fuck, man. That's disgusting behaviour. I understand not wanting your kid to get bullied, but learning to be yourself even when everyone's a cunt is a way more important lesson. Also not sure how they think one Hallowe'en costume somehow means BLAMMO, GAY KIDS!! xD
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #53 on: October 25, 2012, 03:04:58 AM »

I saw a dad with two small kids at the train station just few weeks ago. The older girl (maybe 5-6) was wearing ruby red sparkly slippers and the son (few years younger) was wearing gold versions. I commented how awesome their shoes were, and both were really proud of them  :love5:
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sangrebloom

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #54 on: October 25, 2012, 02:06:23 PM »

adorable!
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #55 on: February 27, 2013, 02:36:26 PM »

This probably should've been given its own thread, given its rather more serious tone...but I'm saving bandwidth and posting it here anyway:     http://edition.cnn.com/2013/02/27/us/colorado-transgender-girl-school/index.html

N.U.

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #56 on: February 27, 2013, 02:50:11 PM »

The comments there are just fucking sad, low-minded and full of ignorance. This is my backyard and I have a simple viewpoint:

If the state legally recognizes the child as female, then a state-funded public school should also recognize the child legally as female. This really isn't difficult.
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Rose

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #57 on: February 27, 2013, 09:49:37 PM »

I understand, from a legal perspective, why they wouldn't want Coy using the girl's bathroom. Even though she identifies as female, she does have male genitalia, and first graders aren't super good about the whole shameshameshamehideyourbody thing yet.. parents might be very uncomfortable to have someone with male genitalia using the same restroom as their little girl if they found out, which they probably would.
But I wish there was a solution that would fit for everyone, because it would have singled Coy out if she had to use the nurse's restroom or the family restroom. This is a shitty situation.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #58 on: February 28, 2013, 06:00:27 AM »

I understand, from a legal perspective, why they wouldn't want Coy using the girl's bathroom. Even though she identifies as female, she does have male genitalia, and first graders aren't super good about the whole shameshameshamehideyourbody thing yet.. parents might be very uncomfortable to have someone with male genitalia using the same restroom as their little girl if they found out, which they probably would.
But I wish there was a solution that would fit for everyone, because it would have singled Coy out if she had to use the nurse's restroom or the family restroom. This is a shitty situation.

But girl's toilets have cubicles. It's not like a men's bathroom with urinals, there's nothing to see. Apart from the urinals part, I'm not even very sure why toilets are segregated.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #59 on: February 28, 2013, 06:16:32 PM »

I understand, from a legal perspective, why they wouldn't want Coy using the girl's bathroom. Even though she identifies as female, she does have male genitalia, and first graders aren't super good about the whole shameshameshamehideyourbody thing yet.. parents might be very uncomfortable to have someone with male genitalia using the same restroom as their little girl if they found out, which they probably would.
But I wish there was a solution that would fit for everyone, because it would have singled Coy out if she had to use the nurse's restroom or the family restroom. This is a shitty situation.

But girl's toilets have cubicles. It's not like a men's bathroom with urinals, there's nothing to see. Apart from the urinals part, I'm not even very sure why toilets are segregated.
I'm actually not sure why toilets are segregated either, but I'm sure some people feel like they need to be. Not that that's a good reason, but maybe they could actually explain it. If the kids were older I would say it was less of a problem, but first graders are practically kindergarteners are kids that age are still not super good with the whole privacy thing (if I remember right from when my Mom was teaching, which I might not).
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N.U.

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #60 on: February 28, 2013, 06:28:24 PM »

It's the same ridiculous Puritanical attitudes towards sex and gender that continue to damage this American society.
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CottonCandy

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #61 on: February 28, 2013, 06:29:44 PM »

But a boy might hear me poop!

I think that's behind it, mainly. I know someone who was so poop-shy she once held it in for nearly 8 days during a summer camp. She only pooped once, and that was at night, and in the nearly-disused outhouse of the camping centre. Why? The indoor ones that were in the same building people slept in, and the chance someone might've woken up and caught her poopin' was too distressing.
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Indja

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #62 on: February 28, 2013, 06:51:10 PM »

But a boy might hear me poop!

I think that's behind it, mainly. I know someone who was so poop-shy she once held it in for nearly 8 days during a summer camp. She only pooped once, and that was at night, and in the nearly-disused outhouse of the camping centre. Why? The indoor ones that were in the same building people slept in, and the chance someone might've woken up and caught her poopin' was too distressing.

We had to deal with this at the summer camp I volunteer at every year. I used to go as a young person too and one year we got sick and tired of all the younger girl holding their poo in so that other people wouldn't hear it. So we put a sign on the bathroom door encouraging people to break the Ta-poo (taboo about poo). It instructed people to start announcing when they were going to poo and encouraged them to debrief to the group afterwards, and also said that there was an official ban on people laughing/commenting on other people's pooing habits unless the person gave explicit permission. It worked like a charm - by the end of the week girls were running up and down the corridor going "I'm away for a poooooo!!" xD
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #63 on: March 01, 2013, 01:16:30 AM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #64 on: March 03, 2013, 04:44:08 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.
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Cirque

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #65 on: March 03, 2013, 05:01:03 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.

Rose

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #66 on: March 03, 2013, 05:11:27 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.
Women's bathrooms are already crazy slow anyway unless you hit them at the proper time (at least at my school)... so I wouldn't have a problem with it. And they could always have urinals in stalls or something for guys to use, which would still be fast and would avoid the hoards of slow women.
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Captain Oblivious

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #67 on: March 03, 2013, 05:35:23 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.
Women's bathrooms are already crazy slow anyway unless you hit them at the proper time (at least at my school)... so I wouldn't have a problem with it. And they could always have urinals in stalls or something for guys to use, which would still be fast and would avoid the hoards of slow women.

I find that if you avoid them at the turn of the hour (at least in uni) then you're golden.
You know how in gym class in school, the showers were all together but they had little partitions and they were at the end of the room? Perhaps they could do something similar with the urinals so that they're still there and still handy and private.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #68 on: March 03, 2013, 05:48:49 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.
Women's bathrooms are already crazy slow anyway unless you hit them at the proper time (at least at my school)... so I wouldn't have a problem with it. And they could always have urinals in stalls or something for guys to use, which would still be fast and would avoid the hoards of slow women.

I find that if you avoid them at the turn of the hour (at least in uni) then you're golden.
You know how in gym class in school, the showers were all together but they had little partitions and they were at the end of the room? Perhaps they could do something similar with the urinals so that they're still there and still handy and private.
I think that would work pretty well. And it's not like girls aren't amazing at not looking at things they don't want to see - they do it all the time in locker rooms at the gym and such. So even if the privacy wasn't perfect, I doubt it would be a problem. But it's the idea of it people hate, no matter how logical a solution you can come up with.
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Captain Oblivious

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #69 on: March 03, 2013, 06:19:44 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.
Women's bathrooms are already crazy slow anyway unless you hit them at the proper time (at least at my school)... so I wouldn't have a problem with it. And they could always have urinals in stalls or something for guys to use, which would still be fast and would avoid the hoards of slow women.

I find that if you avoid them at the turn of the hour (at least in uni) then you're golden.
You know how in gym class in school, the showers were all together but they had little partitions and they were at the end of the room? Perhaps they could do something similar with the urinals so that they're still there and still handy and private.
I think that would work pretty well. And it's not like girls aren't amazing at not looking at things they don't want to see - they do it all the time in locker rooms at the gym and such. So even if the privacy wasn't perfect, I doubt it would be a problem. But it's the idea of it people hate, no matter how logical a solution you can come up with.

I literally don't understand why they (I don't know who "they" are) waste so much space, besides anything else, with having segregated toilets. If you live with a father or brother or boyfriend, you're going to have integrated toilets and I don't know why it's such a big issue.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #70 on: March 05, 2013, 04:14:14 PM »

Tiny kids tend to run around with their clothes off anyway, so if the other girls in the toilets did happen to see anything it probably wouldn't be anything new, and as Roisin said, it's kind of unlikely since there are cubicles, anyway.

Apparently they're phasing out gendered toilets at my old uni. Restroom segregation doesn't seem to have much to do with anything more than just plain old conservative habits.
There's a group or two who have been trying to get that done at the university I may go to. Or they were trying a couple of years ago, I don't know if they're actively trying right now. But they're being met with a fair share of opposition, so I kind of doubt it's going to happen... but it's cool that it's working over on your end of things.
The only problem I could ever see would be the urinals, and that's an obscenely easy problem to rectify.

My only problem with this is that bathrooms would become so much slower. I love urinals, they're so fast.

Can't use em anymore. The PA has seen to that.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #71 on: May 15, 2013, 11:02:25 AM »

Moi would like to invite each of ye to join
The   Church   of   ED WOOD
 :headbang: http://www.edwood.org/  :headbang:



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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #72 on: August 12, 2013, 06:24:24 AM »


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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #73 on: August 12, 2013, 11:23:58 AM »

I would've already asked the store to turn over any surveillance video to the local police, so I could at least attempt to file assault charges on that fucking idiot.

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #74 on: August 12, 2013, 05:50:38 PM »

I would've already asked the store to turn over any surveillance video to the local police, so I could at least attempt to file assault charges on that fucking idiot.
It looks like the mother made the whole thing up. http://www.inquisitr.com/892060/mommy-blogger-lied-about-pink-headband-bullying-baker-acted/
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #75 on: August 12, 2013, 07:05:20 PM »

I would've already asked the store to turn over any surveillance video to the local police, so I could at least attempt to file assault charges on that fucking idiot.
It looks like the mother made the whole thing up. http://www.inquisitr.com/892060/mommy-blogger-lied-about-pink-headband-bullying-baker-acted/

I just read that ^
It's such a shame to make such a thing up, but i'm really glad that it hadn't actually happened, considering all the sorrow and confusion that little boy might have gone through.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #76 on: October 18, 2013, 03:42:35 PM »

This subject might come up again since Halloween is coming along
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #78 on: May 08, 2014, 01:17:56 PM »

shit never ends:    http://jezebel.com/5-year-old-boy-banned-from-playgroup-for-wearing-prince-1573447523

The only wrong thing there, in my humble opinion, is that he owns 100 dresses. That is too much stuff for a kid.
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #79 on: May 13, 2014, 07:29:05 PM »

yeah, that's a bit beyond me, too.

summer camp:    http://dangerousminds.net/comments/adorably_daring_gender_nonconforming_kids

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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #80 on: June 08, 2014, 07:00:41 AM »

Not about cross-dressing specifically, but on the subject of masculinity being something taken more seriously than femininity, I present to you natural selection: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/capital-weather-gang/wp/2014/06/02/female-named-hurricanes-kill-more-than-male-because-people-dont-respect-them-study-finds/
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Re: "is that my son wearing a dress?"
« Reply #81 on: June 19, 2014, 02:11:51 PM »

This is why they need better names

Hurricane Imgonnagityousucka
Hurricane Seriouslyleavebeforeyoudie
Hurricane Lotsofdebris
Hurricane Drowninyourattic

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