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[The Great Ma Chao]

This isn't just directed at you. etc., etc., etc.

Um, excuse me... I am my own goddamn person. I concider myself an artist. I play piano, I work in/act in many local theatres, write poetry and songs, paint, have dreams. I get inspiration from Amanda's art and music, from the passion. I don't idolize her because she's famous or any of that, i respect her as a person because that's what she is. A person who happened to make it big doing something amazing: creating art. When I say 'make it big' it's amazing because she's able to share her art with so many people. I know so many respectable and AMAZING artists where I am, many of them are my friends. I don't know Amanda personally, but I just respect her for what she does, and her music is amazing. I have no intention of becoming famous myself, I don't need fame or people idolizing me, I would hate that. I respect her because she does art because she loves it, to create art that comes from her.

Honestly I didn't even realize what you were talking about in most of this, because I don't think you were really getting what I meant. Is there something wrong with me saying something nice about Amanda? We're all fans, clearly, since we're on here.

I'm fucking tired, I don't know if I'm making any sense.

'I mean, really, a load of people do what you described.' -- What are you reffering to...?

And I never said Amanda was a saint... I even emphized the fact that she's an 'artist'.

But I live an breathe art, wether that means creating it our appreciating other artists. I will retract that thing about MTV, that was shallow, but otherwise I don't see what you mean. It's like appreciating Piccasso or Motzart. It's art.

I appologize if any of that was rude or hard to understand, it wasn't intended to be.

And duh those songs weren't written for me. Why would I think that? what the fuck.

That's nice and fun and cool that you do shit but so what? I didn't say anything about you as an artist; I said something about a sentiment I see spread all across the board. I saw part of it, that blind adoration, when you accredited her blogs as something "really cool and amazing," or some trite comment like that. I'm referring to her talking about her life. EVERYONE does that. Why the fuck is that to be applauded? She's an exhibitionist and it feels good to have people read about what you do, to make you feel important, and in turn tell you how they feel about it, making your life something more important than it actually is. Again; why is that to be applauded?

Again, it's nice and fun and cool that you do what you do, but it's meaningless to me and to what I said. You're so defensive. I said it wasn't a direct message to you, and somehow your eyes just washed over that entire paragraph. I wasn't calling you a complete idiot; I was criticizing part of how you expressed yourself, and moved on to criticize the general attitude towards the band held by most of the members here, who (probably don't just) happen to be newer and younger.

Get past the fact that someone dared to openly criticize something you said and take it for what it was; an opinion, en masse, on the subject of a mishandled dynamic.

[overratedtoejam]

i don't think there's much of a reason to criticize people for the way they love/idolize a person. it happens, it's normal. and there's no proper method of idolizing a band. people respond to the 'dolls music in different ways. maybe you, matt, don't see any reason to respond the way rosesandpianos (or any other similar response) did..but that's the way he/she views the band. just a thought..

[Shakti]

More generally, there is no right or wrong way to feel.  It is what it is; it's what you do with your passing feelings that counts.

[Elle]

More generally, there is no right or wrong way to feel.  It is what it is; it's what you do with your passing feelings that counts.

I agree with you completely.

[overratedtoejam]

you said it better..amen!

[The Great Ma Chao]

Idolization is a foolish thing to feel. It requires noting someone as being better than you, and the general air around here is to get wrapped up in that feeling of idolization and emulate. Again, I am not saying everyone does this one thing; I am saying I have seen the deevolution of this community over the past couple of years, from what it was to what it's become, and it's not good.

I am not telling people how to feel. I am recognizing and criticizing things I think are bad, and it is most definitely an open discussion. I don't believe I've told anyone what to do; I've simply stated what I wish they wouldn't.

[yosmark]

i don't think there's much of a reason to criticize people for the way they love/idolize a person.

A reason, well because you want to give your opinion is a good reason, and because you want to state something.

[Shakti]

That seems like splitting hairs to me.

[overratedtoejam]

Idolization is a foolish thing to feel. It requires noting someone as being better than you, and the general air around here is to get wrapped up in that feeling of idolization and emulate. Again, I am not saying everyone does this one thing; I am saying I have seen the deevolution of this community over the past couple of years, from what it was to what it's become, and it's not good.

I am not telling people how to feel. I am recognizing and criticizing things I think are bad, and it is most definitely an open discussion. I don't believe I've told anyone what to do; I've simply stated what I wish they wouldn't.

i see your point. yes, idolization isn't the best thing to feel. thank god i'm past that stage in my life, but that's how some people look at their artistic heroes...i just kinda accept that and don't take it too seriously. but if you feel the need to give it to them, then by all means..go ahead.

and yosmark. opinions are great, and i was sharing mine. i wasn't saying he shouldn't state his opinion. i was giving my opinion back to him that i don't get why he's criticizing people for how they idolize people. it's called a debate.

[The Great Ma Chao]

i see your point. yes, idolization isn't the best thing to feel. thank god i'm past that stage in my life, but that's how some people look at their artistic heroes...i just kinda accept that and don't take it too seriously. but if you feel the need to give it to them, then by all means..go ahead.

I don't know if anyone said anything to you about it, criticized you, etc., but if they did, would you say it helped you act more, I suppose, independently?

[yosmark]

Ok, I thought that you were asking a question, my bad.

[The Great Ma Chao]

More generally, there is no right or wrong way to feel.  It is what it is; it's what you do with your passing feelings that counts.

Judging by the dynamic of this conversation, it seems like you're sitting back and trying to dole out what is correct, without even engaging in a conversation. Which seems backwards, especially considering how you seem to feel about what I'm saying.

[kayci]

Amen.

I'm really glad you made this post. It felt unfair for you to not be part of the conversation. Everything seems more hopeful now.

I love WKAP and all that Brian's doing, but of course it made me sad to think that there won't be anymore Dolls. If there is, that's wonderful. That's fanfuckingtastic. If not, I think many of us would agree that you two have given so much that no complaints can be made. We got amazing music and an amazing community. A lot of people got even more.

Of course it makes me sad to realize I romanticized your relationship to the point where I didn't think anything like this could be possible. Despite everything Brian said in the Berklee interview last year, when he explained the months you didn't talk and why to me and my friend (who still uses the idea that you two need a break but still love each other as an inspiration to one of her current relationships, showing how she was the only one who took it all optimistically). I forgot you're both human, somehow. It was nice to watch the chemistry on stage and believe in rock love as some sort of fairytale... for a little while. It's even nicer to realize there's still love, despite the reality of it.

Have fun in Europe. I hope the flood of all of this hasn't hurt your mood.

[one_more_reason]

so, hmm. how to explain what I'm feeling. I guess there are a lot of people really torn up about this. I was really sad at first, but after having a day to think about it, I can see that this is right for the band. everyone needs to have time to themselves and explore other options. I'm just glad that amanda explained everything in a very optomistic way; hopefully she's right and after a while the dolls will get together again and tour and be their awesome quirky selves. I know I'll totally support amanda and brian individually, and I'll be looking forward to the day I get to see them together again.

and until then we still have the old music, videos, and memories. even if they don't get together again, they've given us so much already. this is super cheesy, but I just want to say thank you to brian and amanda both for creating this amazing band that changed my life. I'll always love you guys and your music. long live the punk cabaret. <3

[overratedtoejam]

i see your point. yes, idolization isn't the best thing to feel. thank god i'm past that stage in my life, but that's how some people look at their artistic heroes...i just kinda accept that and don't take it too seriously. but if you feel the need to give it to them, then by all means..go ahead.

I don't know if anyone said anything to you about it, criticized you, etc., but if they did, would you say it helped you act more, I suppose, independently?

hmm..i'm not sure. i think it all depends on the person. whether they actually think about what other people say or just brush it off. if it were me i'd probably think to myself "hmm..maybe this is unhealthy. they do eat and shit like everybody else..." (my dad always says that about famous people haha)

Ok, I thought that you were asking a question, my bad.

it's aight...sorry if i came off as bitter..i've had a rough day.