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Author Topic: The Writer's Thread  (Read 19190 times)

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yosmark

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #105 on: January 25, 2009, 08:45:29 PM »

*Hugs .sarah's rejected hug*
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Ms

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #106 on: January 25, 2009, 09:10:12 PM »

I want to put something up, but I dunno. It's not good. I just re-read the best thing I've ever written and it has plot holes and it's too sub-standard to post. Damn my lack of writing skill ~curses~
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yosmark

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #107 on: January 25, 2009, 11:26:53 PM »

Oh... on topic:

I used to want to be a writer, I would even write some stories & shit, I thought I was good at it, I read those some months ago and well... thanks god for Biomedical Engineering. It was beautiful as it lasted, I wrote a story about a girl who was a mess, like a really really big mess, probably it will never see the light. I have all of my shit work in a folder... a secret folder.
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Elle

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #108 on: January 26, 2009, 03:59:56 AM »

Huh. Is anyone else nervous to post actual writing examples? I mean, I plan to have my work published. I don't want it ripped off. And anything you post online can get ripped off....just sayin'.
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Haushinka

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #109 on: January 26, 2009, 10:30:07 AM »

Huh. Is anyone else nervous to post actual writing examples? I mean, I plan to have my work published. I don't want it ripped off. And anything you post online can get ripped off....just sayin'.

Any work that you plan on having published you should have copyrighted. THis avoids these kinds of situations- you don't know who could steal your lappie or transcripts.
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buttercup.

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #110 on: January 26, 2009, 10:31:51 AM »

Huh. Is anyone else nervous to post actual writing examples? I mean, I plan to have my work published. I don't want it ripped off. And anything you post online can get ripped off....just sayin'.

Anything I plan on publishing isn't online. I write a lot of stuff that probably will dust, so might as well show it off.
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Alyss

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #111 on: January 26, 2009, 10:49:49 AM »

I've got stuff hosted on DA, which gives you copyright: http://ladyalyss.deviantart.com/gallery/

Flaws: Don't be shy! The more you put, the more advice you get, and the more you practice, the better you'll be.
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Mockery

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #112 on: January 26, 2009, 11:26:11 AM »

Are we honestly arguing about an internet hug? Five characters in a thread post?
I was about to ask the same thing. I honestly love how we have gotten off topic.
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Alyss

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #113 on: January 26, 2009, 11:28:10 AM »

Shush shush! We're back on topic now, Flaws is going to post her stuff and we'll all give her tips.
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Mockery

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #114 on: January 26, 2009, 11:33:14 AM »

Shush shush! We're back on topic now, Flaws is going to post her stuff and we'll all give her tips.
Okay miss I don't want peole to touch me through the internet.
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Alyss

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #115 on: January 26, 2009, 11:35:15 AM »

Hey! :embarassed:
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Mockery

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #116 on: January 26, 2009, 11:40:45 AM »

Hey! :embarassed:
Sorry, I'll stop now. I'd give you a hug but you don't like that so I'll give you an air hug. *gives air hug*
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Alyss

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #117 on: January 26, 2009, 11:43:22 AM »

Thankyou... :-\
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Ms

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #118 on: January 26, 2009, 11:50:44 AM »

Shush shush! We're back on topic now, Flaws is going to post her stuff and we'll all give her tips.

Am I? Um, well, okay. Judge as hard as you wish:

The first day, she shows up unannounced on her doorstep, smiling that crazed smile of hers and she bounces in and winks and says "Hi Anita!" like she was completely wanted, like nothing was wrong. Anita clenches her hands at the sight of her and tighter when she notices a yellow bruise on her cheekbone.
"Hello Zoe. Nice to see you."
"It feels like forever, doesn't it? But it's only been a month," Zoe says and sits on the couch. The moment is awkward and quiet and Anita feels sick for some reason.
"Want some tea?" she asks to fill the gap and Zoe nods quietly and turns to watch the TV.
In the kitchen, Anita tries to breathe. She tries to focus on the tea, and she fills the kettle up and fetches the cups and ingredients with expert precision. She is calmer when the tea is done and she walks out and gives Zoe her cup. They drink it in silence and pretend to watch TV. There are unanswered questions and truths hanging around them like fallen streamers, tangling in their hair and making things so difficult.

"A storm is coming," the weather man with a soft voice informs them from the television and she switches the channel.

They hardly speak for the rest of the night.

"I need to borrow some clothes," she states towards the end of the night and leaves the room, and Anita closes her eyes and counts backwards from ten. Calming thoughts of places she wishes to visit in Mexico next year help, but Zoe comes back quick enough wearing a blue night dress and a smirk on her face to bid her goodnight and she wants to make the bruise bigger.

The air was still thick, but she put this down to the storm and locks up all the windows tight. Branches scratched at the glass panes asking to be let in, but she shut the thick cotton curtains and turned her back. Rain splattered on the roof and she crawled up in bed and stared at her alarm clock. When she is woken two hours later, blonde hair tickling her elbow and a quiet voice whispering "Anita?" over and over she is not surprised. She flips over and glares but Zoe ignores it and says "There are twenty four letters separating our names."

Anita closes her eyes and tries to go back to sleep.

The second day she wakes up to a pointed chin digging into her collarbone and blue eyes watching her.
"I have to work," she sighs and moves out from underneath her.
"Do you have to? I thought that we could do something?"
Anita stands up and tries to get the itchiness out of her scalp.
"I can't just stay home. I'm not going to waste my sick days like that," she can practically feel the hurt look even with her back turned so she turns to face her, "Besides, what would we do?"
"We could go to a restaurant? Then walk around, have an adventure?" Zoe sits up excited, a happy spark in her eyes. The dress she borrowed is too big and hangs off her awkwardly leaving a pool of negative space between the material and her chest.
Funny. Anita thought they used to be the same size.
"Maybe when I finish my shift. Go out and buy some clothes and whatever else you need and then call me at around three and we'll see."
"I haven't got any money," she says nonchalantly but she shifts nervously in bed. It takes all the strength Anita has not to roll her eyes. She can't take this anymore.
"What happened?"
Silence floods the room.
"I don't want to talk about it right now."
"Fine. Just, fine! Be like that. My money's in my purse, I know that's what you want. I'm having a shower," Anita snaps and snatches clothes from her wardrobe. Her movements are sharp and angry and Zoe is soft and sad and Anita can almost feel her break.

She doesn't stomp out or slam the door, but she rips her clothes off and avoids her eyes in the mirror. Her alarm clock goes off loudly from her room and she laughs bitterly. The wind is still howling and it must be cold out because it takes so long for the water to heat up.
Calming down is what she has to do. It wouldn't be Zoe if there wasn't drama, she reminds herself, it wouldn't be Zoe if she wasn't spending all her time getting into trouble and taking all her stuff. Halfway through washing her hair she realizes she was thinking about the situation so much she can't remember whether she was up to conditioning her hair or not. In the end it wasn't worth it, so she washes out whatever the heck is in her hair and turns the water off.

When she leaves for work fifteen minutes later Zoe is nowhere to be seen and her purse has been moved.
She was wrong about her being broken.
Work was hard and monotonous and just as tiring as every other day. It was a large office but somehow it always stunk of body odor and the lunches of thirteen other people. She answered phone calls and typed up documents and photocopied and counted down the minutes.

"I heard Zoe is back in town?" asks one of her co workers, Nina, during a smoke break.
"Yeah, she is."
"She staying with you?"
Anita nods her head. Nina snorts.
"God, I wouldn't let her in my house after everything she did."
"What happened?" asks one of the new employees bravely. Nina looks thrilled at the chance to gossip. Anita bites down on her cigarette. "I can't do this," she thinks, "I can't do this." People walk past in a hurry, they are looking but they don't really see a thing, they speak but they don't say anything and Anita must be breathing but she can't feel a thing.
"Zoe was the last assistant here, not that you'd know it. She was awful at her job. Anyway," Nina pauses and glances at Anita for a second but Anita doesn't say a thing so she continues, "There was a man who worked here. His name was Joe. Not Joe in Accounting, a different Joe. Worked in the IT department. So one day Zoe isn't at her desk and Joe isn't picking up the phone so David gets pissed and does this big search. Turns out they were getting it on in Conference Room B. David fired them both on the spot and Zoe started crying and stuff and Joe, he just walks out. The next anyone knows Zoe's left town and Joe's in the hospital after a suicide attempt. He's fine now apparently. He's moving down south, to Goondi, I think."
"Wow. It all sounds pretty dramatic."
"You have no idea kid."

When Anita goes big in, her head is screaming and her palms hurt from digging her fingernails into her palms.
The phone doesn't stop ringing for the rest of the day but none are from Zoe. She signs out and says goodbye to everyone and catches the bus home. The house is empty and silent and the cold of the morning had dissipated hours ago and left behind hot humidity. She can't breathe so she throws open all the windows and tries to shoo it out but it had already made itself at home. Everything is wrong, everything feels wrong and she slumps down onto the couch and thanks God she's alone.

Then Zoe comes through the door wearing her favourite shirt and a sheepish smile. Anita stares up at her with blank eyes and the running commentary in her head screams "Didn't we used to understand each other? Can't she see something is wrong?" But Zoe just smiles back and says "I'm ready to talk.”
So Zoe talks and Anita listens, just like every other time.

"After I left, I went upstate to stay with Rachel and Jason, remember them? They live up in the big city now and they said I could crash there? You know I love it there and after I got fired I felt like I needed to get away. You may belong to these small towns but don't you ever feel like you are suffocating? That's how I feel. Anyway, I took a bus up there, this five hour long drive. There was this man," she leans forward and Anita adds another mark to her mental tally of stories that seem to include this fact, "He had a lisp and he was Italian. We met on the bus and we spent the whole time talking. He held my hand and helped me down the stairs. It was all so nice. So I gave him my mobile number but I didn't really expect him to ring. So, like, the third day I'm there my phone is going off and I was like 'what!?' because I didn't think anyone would be calling and it was him. He asked me out and I was like 'hell yes!' except not like that because I didn't want him to think I was too keen, you know? The date was fantastic. It was all so fantastic but we were moving so fast but I was just like go with the flow, you know? We'd been dating like three weeks and he was like move in with me and I thought Rachel and Jason were starting to get a bit annoyed, so I said yes. But then one day I came out and he started yelling and saying I looked like a whore and I should be ashamed of myself. I started to go out less because I didn't want to annoy him. One day Jason called and he punched me in the face and as soon as that happened I was like 'oh shit' so I locked myself in the bathroom and climbed out the window. That's why I had no clothes or money. Rachel and Jason let me borrow the money to come back. I got so lucky. I keep thinking about how close I came to destruction."
The silence filled the room and Zoe bit her lip. She looked so small that Anita reached out and hugged her and Zoe clung on and sobbed.
In the back of her head she wondered what the hell Zoe had been thinking moving in with someone after three weeks but for the first time in so long she felt sympathy with the girl.

On the third day, Zoe made her breakfast.
"Toast and fruit! I was going to make pancakes but you've moved everything around since I was last here," and Anita smiled and thanked her, not having the guts to tell her that she rarely ate breakfast because it always made her stomach upset so she ate a piece of toast before saying she had to run off for the bus.
"Take a piece of toast!" Zoe insisted so Anita sighed and took it, hurrying off to work. She ate the toast on the bus, much to the annoyance of the driver.

Work was worse because by now everyone had heard of Zoe's return and wanted the scoop. They would waddle over, lunch in hand and ask and she said "yes, she is. She's well, thank you for asking" and nothing more causing them to shuffle back to their desks in a disgruntled manner.
On the fourth day Zoe showed up at lunch time. She ignored the stares and the whispers of "How can she show her face here?"
"Got time for lunch?" she asked in a bored manner, glaring at a miniature red telescope "Is this new?"
"Yes it is. I like it."
"It's hideous," she paused to toy with it, "So do you have time?"
The phone rang loudly, the little light blinking in their face.
"After this."
Anita picked up the phone to immediately be bitched out by a customer and Zoe tried to see what her old desk looked like now. Nina took this as her opportunity and stalked over.
"Hi Zoe," she said stiffly.
"Yo Nina. The weight loss is going well. You look like you've lost a few kilos."
"Thank you," she paused before adding, "I'm surprised you decided to show your face."
"I'm surprised that in the month and a half I've been away your face has gained more wrinkles."
Nina sucked her cheeks in and Anita tried not to laugh and focus on the upset customer.
"You should be ashamed."
"Oh Nina! You sound just like a wife," Zoe dropped down to one knee, "Marry me Nina."
Nina stormed off to fume elsewhere and Zoe yelled out "You know you want to!" before nearly collapsing with laughter. Zoe crawled back over and began to go through the drawers, pulling things out and putting them in her pockets.
Anita hung up and began to gather up her stuff.
"You're a brave person, I'll give you that."
"For going up against Nina?" Zoe raised an eyebrow and stood up, "It's not that hard. Just tell her to fuck off one day, she'll cry forever."
Anita decided that ignoring her was her only option. "Where are we going?"
"Don't care, I just want to eat. I called the bank this morning and got my cards canceled. Also got some money out, so I'm good for a while."
"I'll bet. Let's go to the restaurant over the street."

They walked in silence. The thick cloud cover didn't prevent the heat and the weight of it pressed down on her skull. She picked at the skin of her fingers so much she felt them bleed.
They decided to share an expensive meal and Zoe smiled at her and Anita's skin prickled.
"Is it just me or has this place gotten more expensive in the time I've been away? Because that's crazy. I was only away like a month or some-"
"That's not what I meant about being brave."
Zoe frowned. "What?"
"When I said you were brave back at the office. I meant that you showed up. You could have called."
"What do I care what they think? They already thought I was whore."
"Did you know Joe tried to kill himself?"
There was a pause and Zoe frowned even more.
"No," she opened her mouth to say something, but changed her mind. She shook her head a little. "When?"
"The day after you left. I went to visit him, but no one was there. When I got home, his mother had left me a message on my phone."
"Did you visit him?"
"Yeah. I couldn't not."
"Is he alright now?"
The waiter came and gave them their drinks, interrupting the flow. Zoe fiddled with her straw before taking a sip.
"I don't know. I haven't talked to him for a while. Nina says he's moving to Goondi."
"I thought you would have been all over him? Why not?"
Anita bit her lip, and closed her eyes. "You know why."
"I thought you were over that."
"He was my fiancé!" She hissed, "Of course I'm not. I don't think I will be for a while. Shit Zoe, it's been a month. That may be a long time for you, time enough for you to move on, but not me."
"I wasn't moving on! I wasn't. God," she took a breath, "I was going through some shit. I grabbed hold of what I could."
"You were going through shit?! What about me? Do you ever think about me Zoe? In your messed up little head, did it ever occur to you that people would be hurt by this? I sit through you with this crap, year after year and I love you and you give me this."
"Like it was all my fault! He played a part too."
"We aren't talking about him!" Anita's breath was coming fast now, she had to calm down.
Ten,
"Come on, Anita,"
Nine,
"I made a mistake,"
Eight,
"A big one. I can never justify it,"
Seven,
"And I am so, so sorry,"
Six,
"But right now I can't deal with this,"
Five,
"There's more on my mind,
Four,
"Bigger issues on my mind."
Three,
"You have to understand,"
Two,
"You are the only one who understands,"
One,
"I love you."
Anita slammed her hands down onto the table.
"No. I can't do this anymore. When did this get so hard? When did I spend my time tip toeing around you to spare your feelings because I couldn't deal with the crap that came with it? When did it get so God damn hard to give a damn about you? When did we stop caring about each other so much? When did you become such a self absorbed snot rag, content only to ruin everyone else's lives? Well, I can't do it. This is it, Zoe. I just can't deal with it anymore."
She stormed out and ran back to the office, where she tried to look as calm as possible before finding her way to the bathroom where she locked herself in and cried.

David must have gotten wind of what had happened and sent Nina in to tell her she could go home early if she wanted. She sat there and stared at the dirty floor and Nina's high heeled black shoes on the other side of the stall door and tried to remind herself that no matter what you can live anything down instead of focusing on the painful ache of embarrassment on her skin.
Thunder cracked and Anita walked home in the rain. She loved the rain. Little droplets touched her skin and she felt like maybe this was good. This was change, things could only get better. She watched people run to avoid it but she just walked.
She wasn't okay, she wasn't but things would get better.
Zoe didn't show up again.
Twenty five days without her. Twenty five days of peace. Twenty five days were she was left alone with her thoughts and no incessant talking. Then on the twenty sixth day she gets a phone call from a grieving brother who sobs "She's dead she's dead" down the crackly phone line and that night she sleeps in the spare room on the sheets she still hadn't changed for twenty six days and wondered why there was always so much separating them.
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Elle

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Re: The Writer's Thread
« Reply #119 on: January 26, 2009, 12:08:57 PM »

Yeah, but copyrights get ignored ALL the time on the internet, and I don't really have the resources to do anything about it.

The way I see it, I'll keep anything that I plan to publish in my own files. But I might post something that I wrote just for fun, if we are posting things. :]
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Only when you eat a lemon do you appreciate what sugar is. Life is a paradox...but is it really? Is the contradictions within and around us really a formal dissonance, or just another word for a chord in a language we're yet to discover?
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